Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Point of View


So maybe it's just because I've been trapped in the house way too much lately, but it occurred to me today that building a house is a lot like raising a family. It starts out as a very romantic dream, with visions of perfection and order. You quickly realize that in life, like any construction project, there are a lot of unromantic and not so fun parts. You know what I am  talking about - fevers, teething, middle of the night wake ups, unpredictable tantrums and  pure exhaustion caused directly from the one million times a day that I have to say, "stop touching your brother." 

 My close friend Jonna and I have this joke that we want to create a reality show where we kidnap a new bride right before she goes on her honeymoon and gently explain to her that she has no bloody idea what she has gotten herself into. The show, like the movie "Christmas Carol"  would show her what her life will truly be like in the future.  Ahhh, the possibilities. I think if you really knew what your were getting yourself into when building a home, you might think twice.

 Like life, the construction project continues,  we are picking out tile and faucets  and trying to stay on budget.  At home, we  arrange playdates and after school activities in a way that keeps everyone happy, healthy and well rounded.  There are snowstorms, snowdays and school delays.  The construction crew misses days due to bad weather, and sometimes moms miss an entire week of "life" staying home with sick kids. Along the way we question ourselves......"Did they get enough vegatables? Was I yelling too much today?"  How about the guilt from the the youngest eating way too many gummies.  Or my personal favorite-  maybe I need to play more board games with the middle one..... After spending 2 hours picking out my appliances , I spent another 2 hours  re-researching (yes, re- researching) the Bosch fridge after reading some silly review on some web site stating that the ice maker was problematic and noisy.  Ah yes, Im the mother who googled (to death) pre- packaged snacks  after hearing some tidbit of news that they contain unhealthy chemicals. Yes, I know, redundant.    I wonder ....will the kitchen be too white?  Should I add more color in the master bathroom? Oh god, did I make the kids bunk room too small for well....bunkbeds?   But just as we forget how long it took to find the perfect (backordered and over budget) sink as soon as the UPS driver delivers it,  we forget almost instantaneously about the whopper of a tantrum our 5 year old had yesterday when he stumbles sweetly down the stairs in his feety pajamas with "blankie" trailing behind him. 

 It goes like that, doesn't it?  I know I'm far from perfect, whether it is rennovator or mother. But still I put my heart into it, making mistakes along the way. Like the time I completely forgot to pick up one of my children at preschool.  They called me wondering where I was, and I did what every self-respecting mother would do.......blamed the father.  Sorry Joe :)  When we were looking at the final plans for the house, I realized  that we completely forgot the outside shower.  Lucky for me, my husband, builder and preschool director have a sense of humor.  I'm sure I will make plenty of mistakes during this building process, but either way, I hope the outcome to be the same - that at the end of the day, we create a mostly happy house- not without imperfections or chaos, but a house that will be filled with memories. I have come to  realize that it is about the journey.  It's about the times you stumble, and the times you succeed. I try not to take it for granted. I am incredibly lucky. I get to be a part of building something beautiful.  Life is what you make of it, how you see it.  After all, it's really about the "view"-  right?   

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